One Flat Tyre and Two Slow Leeks

I got one flat tyre and two slow leeks

I’m just trying to stay away from misery

My baby’s been waiting for me across town

And I’m trying real hard not to let her down

I took a job in a factory

To pay for my Emma’s jewellery

It didn’t work out and they asked me to leave

Now I gotta find a way to make some quick money

I tried selling drugs on the street

But all I got was ripped off by police

The hookers don’t like me and the bums’ spit at my feet

But I know my Emma loves me n that’s all I need

I got one flat tyre and two slow leeks

I’m just trying to stay away from misery

My baby’s been waiting for me across town

And I’m trying really hard not to let her down

This was driving me nuts I was about to give in

Then I started thinking about true love n started talking about sin

I sat at the bar drinking till 3 and I drew up a plan for a robbery

I’ll steal the fastest car I could find

But all it got was a Datsun 120Y

I broke into that factory

I stole all the cash and all their whisky

I drove that car as fast as I could

But the tyres on the car they weren’t no good

I got one flat tyre and two slow leeks

I’m just trying to stay away from misery

My baby’s been waiting for me across town

And I’m trying real hard not to let her down

I got to the Ampol down the street

When I saw the cops were chasing me

I looked in the glove box n found a gun

I was shitting myself I never shot anyone

But I kept thinking of Emma waiting for me

I'll make it to her door if it fucking kills me!

The cops drove up to me and they were laughing

He said “pull over son and drop the weapon”

I said, “fuck you cop!” and fired but nothing happened

Turned out the car belonged to a local priest

Who never loads his weapons

I got one flat tyre and two slow leeks

I’m just trying to stay away from misery

My baby’s been waiting for me across town

And I’m trying hard not to let her down

So, they put me in jail, I got 7 years

I pleaded guilty, so I’ll be out in 3

Poor Emma waits so patiently

But I been working inside and saving money

The day I got out I went to the pawn shop

I said, “give me the biggest diamond ring that you got!”

It cost me every penny I saved

But I know my Emma’s worth it in every way

Now I got the ring, and my mind is set

I’m so excited I can’t believe it!

I knocked on her door and her Mum answered

She said “I’m sorry son, but Emma died of cancer”

Turned out she smoked 5 packets a day

Waiting for me to take her away

If it weren’t for that car being such a piece of shit

We’d be happily wed and always doing it!

But I had….

One flat tyre and two slow leeks

I’m just trying to stay away from misery

My baby was waiting for me across town

But I got there too late, and I let her down

2010