The Tale of Flying Willy Squashwater

Well I was sad and tired of searching for a girl

When on a hot summer night, I walked into her world

She was standing alone underneath the streetlight

With her long black hair and black dress so tight

My eyes met hers she was drawing me in

With her super sexy ultra-vixen power-beam

I was taken over I was paralysed

Then she took my hand and put it in between her thighs

Before I knew it, we were getting it on

Right there and then she wasn’t taking me home

Then I felt something moving as she squeezed me tight

She dug in her claws, and I felt her bite

This was getting too weird it just didn’t feel right

There was something strange about her glowing eyes

I know that it’s only a matter of time

Till she sucks me right in and scrambles my mind

I had to be strong and take some drastic measures

In order to save us from her evil pleasures

So I told her to meet me underneath the streetlight

And at midnight sharp she materialised

But as I was watching her from my car

I saw she had a fucking tail and a head like a shark

Then she changed back into that pretty young thing

That took me by the balls and put a spell on me

She said, come here boy I want you inside me

I said, sorry honey but that’s not gonna be likely

now that I seen your real identity

I know what I must do for the good of humanity

So, I drew my sword and swung it at her neck

And just like Medusa I lobbed off her head

Snakes and shit went shooting out and her body shrivelled up in a heap on the ground

Then her head said "Oh puny human, I’ll get you next time"

"We will invade your world and take over your minds!"

I said "I don’t think so demon hooker"

"Not while you’re dealing Willy Squashwater"

"Now it’s time to say your last goodbye!"

Then I split her in half right between the eye’s

Now the world is safe unbeknownst to you

So, get on with your day and get out there and pay your dues

And if this kind of thing happens again

You can count on good old Flying Willy Squashwater

To take care of it then

So goodbye farewell and have a nice day

There’s no reason to fear

Demonic hookers won’t invade the Earth

And, for what’s it’s worth

You’re welcome Perth

2015

https://ivangianpiero.bandcamp.com/track/the-legend-of-flying-willy-squashwater